| Popping My Digicam's Cherry | |
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| Photograph | |||
| I finally purchased my own digital camera on my birthday! I know the picture is mis-month labeled, since my birthday is June 1st... But I didn't feel like re-tagging it. So we'll pretend I took this picture in May, okay? | |||
| Rate Me: Not or Not | |
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| Photograph | |||
| What a horrible picture. This isn't my absolute worst, but it's still at the lower end of my appearance spectrum. I suppose if I had pictures from my when I actually had a broken nose, rather than simply a Biore pore strip, I would look worse in those images. | |||
| The Left Nipple Is Photogenic | |
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| Photograph | |||
| Another landmark: the first photograph of my pierced nipple(s). I took one of both, but the flash made my chest look just awful... So I only kept this one. | |||
| I'm Tired | |
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| Photograph | |||
| Let's continuie with my not-so-flattering pictures. I'm about to fall asleep here. So I take and a picture and prepare to do the only thing that will keep me awake. | |||
| How Close Can It Get? | |
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| Photograph | |||
| For some reason, this picture sat in a random folder on my hard drive for months, alone, even though all the others in its series had made it onto The Orphanage. I mean, it's not that bad, is it? | |||
| Whoo! | |
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| Photograph | |||
| And that solitary method of consciousness? Smiling like an idiot, of course! Getting myself to make this face gave me at least another fifteen minutes before passing out, I'm sure. | |||
| The Rest of the World Is Blue | |
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| Photograph | |||
| When we got our house re-paneled last summer, we also got a new window installed in my room. Unfortunately, the guy didn't get the correct-size window for the hole in the wall (the fact that the house seems to have been built without the use of a level didn't help, I'm sure), so now there's a crack in the window pane. Anyway, until I get curtains for the window, it is covered by this blue Neat Sheet. Neat, huh? | |||
| I Separate the World | |
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| Photograph | |||
| Somehow, although certainly not intentionally, I managed to place myself right between the blue area and the "normal" area of the background in this picture. It's fate! | |||
| The Turtle Club | |
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| Photograph | |||
| I kept this picture because it's not horrible. I just look rather turtley in it. I think I craned my neck in it, resulting in my collar worming its way higher on my neck. And I can't think of any more ways to fit in animal names into this description, so I'm going to stop now. | |||
| Tonight, On a Very Special | |
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| Photograph | |||
| This kind of looks like a cap from a WB primetime drama's opening credits, right? Right? | |||
| Blue Skin Discoloration | |
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| Photograph | |||
| The tarp over my window has some interesting effects. When the outside is bright, it emits a permeating blue haze through my room. It sometimes catches me. | |||
| Around We Go | |
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| Photograph | |||
| Finally, the first good picture of my :face from my digicam. I couldn't decide what I wanted a background during this photo shoot, so I wound up spinning around as I took pictures. This wound up in the rest of the world getting a bit blurry. | |||
| Awkward | |
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| Photograph | |||
| Yeah, this picture is just weird. I can't explain why. Maybe the flash? I don't know. It's so odd! | |||
| I Can Be the Hardest Ass Ever | |
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| Photograph | |||
| I totally look like a hardass in this one. Don't fuck with me! | |||
| Aloof? No, a Loof! | |
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| Photograph | |||
| I called this picture "aloof," but it doesn't really make me seem aloof or whimsical... just angry. I have trouble smiling. | |||
| A Little Meh-Time | |
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| Photograph | |||
| The previos picture looked a little "meh" too, but this one wins the cake... or takes the cake. | |||
| Suppress the Laughter | |
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| Photograph | |||
| I think this explains why I try to avoid smiling in pictures. It usually comes out making me look like I have the poops... but the funny poops! | |||
| That's Right! | |
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| Photograph | |||
| So I'm pretty damn excited! Yeah! You got it right! Go you! | |||
| Oh-em-gee! | |
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| Photograph | |||
| It's astounding! You can see the inside of my mouth! It's amazing! You don't want to see it, do youଥ But you can! Astounding! OMG! | |||
| Boring, Dull, Drab, Plain | |
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| Photograph | |||
| I'm too bored to write a description. | |||
| I Am Peaceful Whilst I Spin | |
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| Photograph | |||
| I sure as hell have never felt this calm in my life. I think I may have just caught myself in the middle of a blink. But, whatever the case, I look pretty damn meditative, if I do say so myself. And, well, I do. Say so myself, that is. | |||
| Oh My Gosh | |
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| Photograph | |||
| I pause for a moment while spinning, shocked by--could it be?!?--nothing at all! Oh, no! Well, then I suppose I'll continue taking pictures of myself. Thank you very much. | |||
| I'm Not Quite Certain | |
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| Photograph | |||
| I took several photos in this shoot, but this was the only picture decent enough to actually keep. I'm suspicious, however. I have my eye on you... in the suspicious sense. | |||
| Trimmed and Quite Clean | |
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| Photograph | |||
| I just trimmed my legs with electric clippers! Yay for body-part pictures. | |||
| What? | |
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| Photograph | |||
| Unfortunately, getting out of First, eating breakfast, shaving, showering, getting dressed, and doing my hair really say nothing about the whether I've actually woken up. And even if, somewhere along the way, I were actually able to wake up... that would still say nothing about whether I'd succeed in staying awake. | |||
| I'm So Exhausted | |
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| Photograph | |||
| I just slept for a whole two hours and then got up early for job interviews. I just want to curl up and sleep for days. But, no, I plaster a fake smile instead. | |||
| Let's SD This Mother-Fucker! | |
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| Photograph | |||
| Knowing that I have to stay awake, I take a deep breath and silently decide to SD the motherfucker; i.e., "Let's fucking do this." | |||
| I Would Never Do That | |
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| Photograph | |||
| Unfortunately, that poem was written to his "coy mistress," not his "coy mister," so I unfortunately can't apply it to myself here. There's a bit of wariness here as well, but I'm getting a little tired of commenting on my facial expressions. I bet you're getting tired of hearing the comments too, aren't you? | |||
| Hey, There | |
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| Photograph | |||
| Although I'm falling off of the photo in this one, I kind of like it. There's also a fair amount of focus left over for my Firstroom decorations, mostly high school stuff in this corner. Give a damn. | |||
| Emotionless, As We All Should Be | |
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| Photograph | |||
| I have a tan, and I just got back from a date. Yet, I'm lacking emotion. Well, in this photo at least. | |||
| Desperate Times Call For Ass-Kicking | |
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| Photograph | |||
| If you look at your display from the right angle, you can see a dashed line going down my left cheek. A scar? A message from aliens? Only the gecko truly knows. | |||
| Cue the 1900s Music | |
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| Photograph | |||
| Another landmark: the first non-auto-color photograph taken with my digital camera. It's not really that fabulous a shot of me, but the sepia tone of it makes me love it too much to chunk. Is that a piano playing in the background? | |||
| Last Photo in This Shoot | |
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| Photograph | |||
| It's kind of obvious that I'm holding my camera with outstretched arms in this one, but it's still an okay picture. Not my best ever, but, well, judge for yourself. | |||
| Facing Front | |
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| Photograph | |||
| This was the best shirtless shot I got of myself all summer. | |||
| The Profile | |
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| Photograph | |||
| Look at the breadth from the front of my chest to my back! It's insane! My bone structure hates me, I swear. | |||